December 13, 2014


I love winter reds and their glint in winter light. Winter again - seasons seem shorter every lap. I've been thinking about this past year...Romy brought it in with import. What a babe! We have hardly lost a night's sleep with her and she is on the cusp of turning one. There is something so moving about that mark of time. I mean it is glorious to see babies grow and soon to have kids who will tote themselves, but her unravelling self is almost too much to take in - I can't keep up and I'm uneasy about not reaping it in. I struggle with balance - no, I fail. My accident pushed me further from my girls because I've been focused on lying in a bed healing or working with a physical therapist to walk well again, such a tedious endeavor, at a moment where I feel like I have no time to spare.

The silver lining has been Xavier taking over. Romy's eyes fire with excitement when Xavier enters the room. Watching their relationship thrive is humbling - makes me realize how much I boxed him out and hoarded baby Colette. I sort of believed Colette needed me more than him, but now I see little baby Romy fulfilled in other ways and she is probably a lot more balanced.

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